Here in sunny Paraguay, like in every country (except maybe Dubai where you can probably buy a private road) you share the highways with a huge variety of other vehicles and drivers, some a bit safer than others. The wealthy residents of Asunción may still drive around in their Porsche Cayenne Turbos, Range Rovers, Toyota Land Cruisers and BMW X5’s, but they’re alongside buses, lorries and ‘ordinary’ cars. Sometimes , whilst driving along a rutted side street, their progress may suddenly be impeded by a wooden cart pulled by a badly-whipped and clearly none too happy horse. The Cayenne driver, despite having around 450 horses straining under his right foot, still has to sit at 3mph behind the man that’s trundling along, happily transporting bags full of old plastic bottles upon his cart. As you can imagine, it makes the satisfaction of owning such a car a little less when you can’t even overtake a single gee gee! Sadly, the contrast in wealth between the two drivers really drives home the point about poverty and the distribution of wealth in the country.
Fortunately, the less wealthy members of society that maybe can’t afford a car have a viable alternative as the next step up from the horse and cart (if you ignore the bicycle!) must surely be the motorcycle.
Since I first visited Asunción back in 2001, there has been an explosion in the number of motorcycles on the roads. Thanks to the massive importation of cheap bikes from China (such as Taiga and Yamazuki), and the locally-assembled Leopard and Kenton brands, they’re absolutely everywhere. Almost every one of these motorcycles is a copy of a tried-and-tested Japanese model from two decades ago (the most common being the Honda CG125 or Cub 90). They are being sold literally everywhere, often with monthly payments as low as G$150,000 (around £21) for a brand new model. They’re advertised everywhere as being ‘as cheap as the bus’ and as the typical fare around Asunción is currently 28p per journey, a whole month’s worth of trips to and from work alone would be almost £20. As a result, hundreds of thousands of people have ‘upgraded’ their daily commute to work from being packed in like sardines in a very hot tin, to a quick dash to work on their very own motorcycle. The fact that the weather is hot and sunny for 90% of the time makes it a lot more pleasurable than being a motorcyclist in the UK. I reckon I only used my own motorcycle two or three times in the last year, thanks to the non-existent summer and the freezing and snowy winter.

Rows of gleaming Leopards at a local dealer

Rows of gleaming Leopards at a local dealer

Unlike the UK with its rules and regulations regarding engine capacity, power output and CBT (Compulsory Basic Training), Paraguay doesn’t seem to have many rules at all! There don’t appear to be many 50cc mopeds around as the majority of bikes are 110cc, 125cc, 150cc or 200cc, which of course go like stink! The only ‘moped’ I’ve noticed is a modernised version of the famous Puch Maxi from the 1970’s and 80’s (sold here under the brand Hero-Puch). There are bikes of all styles, from the standard Honda CG copy to the ‘Sports’, the‘Cruiser’ and the ‘Retro’, all based on virtually the same 1 cylinder, 4-stroke Honda-derived engine. I first noticed that their bikes seem a bit noisier than ones in the UK, but that seems to be because almost every exhaust system on every bike has had the baffle removed by the owner in an attempt to either extract an ounce more power, or so that the pretty ‘Chicas’ can hear them approaching!

Now, I used to do that on my Yamaha FS1E in 1985 (when I was 16), so I’m glad to see that the tradition lives on into adulthood here! Another thing is that many of the new bikes on the road don’t have any number plates (although some do) and I’ve no idea why? Just like a UK teenager might squander his meagre earnings from Burger King on‘customising’ his K-reg Corsa with most of the contents of the local Halfords, the motorcyclists of Paraguay still manage to spend a few of their hard-earned Guaranies on pimping-up their Leopards or Kentons. I’ve seen several bikes with pink and blue neon lighting under the engine, blue LED sidelamps, HID Xenon headlamp bulbs and of course, the usual tassels and leather goods for the ‘Kenton Classic 150’. I’ve even seen little LED’s on the spokes of the wheels, making them look like a Katherine wheel as they drive along! Driving at night time here is a full-on visual assault on your senses as there’s so many flashing lights on the cars and bikes here, you never know what you’ll see next! Last night whilst following a motorcyclist along the road, he braked and both his indicators both flashed LED’s of many colours, and his brake light resembled the front grill of Kit, the 1982 Firebird from Knight Rider!

Some of them even have crash helmets!

Some of them even have crash helmets!

I know I’ve mentioned in a previous post that motorcyclists often carry more than the one recommended passenger, and so far, the most I’ve seen on a bike was a family of five! It’s a tribute to how strong these bikes must be if entire families can travel together, toddler at the front (sitting on the petrol tank) holding onto the mirrors, dad behind (usually the only one wearing a helmet) and mum behind him, holding a small baby in one hand and the shopping in the other). For a third child, they normally sit between mum, the baby and dad. Amazingly, the bikes still manage to keep-up with the flow of traffic, and I’ve yet to see a child that looks any more scared than I am! Although the solo motorcyclist will often weave in and out of traffic and appear to be generally quite reckless, the entire family that travel on one bike usually keep to the left hand lane and don’t go too mad. Accidents involving entire families would appear to be few and far between, as I’d imagine that the police would clamp-down on such activities if it became a problem. As it is, the complete lack of compulsory training and the novice riders on fairly fast machines ensure that across the country, there are numerous accidents every day, with, many sadly fatal. The fact that very few people wear crash helmets, and none wear any form of gloves or leathers (as it’s too damn hot!), and even a minor fall can cause severe grazing and damage to unprotected flesh. As we sat outside El Bar on Avenida España, enjoying a jug of Sangria, a motorcyclist went over a pothole and promptly fell-off less than 10 metres away from us. He was wearing shorts and no helmet (it was on his arm, not on his head), but apart from some grazing and a bent bike, he got-up and walked away. Two policemen standing across the road came to see him and after chatting to him for a few minutes, he managed to kickstart the engine into life and rode-off with a broken headlamp and I suspect some aches and pains. It could’ve been a lot worse if he’d have been run over after falling, but fortunately, traffic wasn’t too heavy at that time.

Safety in numbers.

Safety in numbers.

If you’re a bit wobbly on two wheels, there’s plenty of other options to choose from. Kenton and Taiga both produce bizarre-looking 3 wheelers, with a motorcycle front and a kind of cargo box on the back. I’ve seen 4 children being carried in these. There’s also a selection of terrifying quad bikes, such as the Kenton Pit Bull! I’ve seen 150cc bikes towing trailers, including a refrigerated ice-cream carrier! Even when it’s pouring with rain here, the motorcyclists are still wearing only shorts and T shirts – as soon as the shower stops, the burning sun dries them in a few minutes. The rain is usualy fairly warm anyway, and is probably quite refreshing.

A truck load of Kenton Quad bikes for sale.

A truck load of Kenton Quad bikes for sale.

As a by-product of this huge number of motorcycles on the roads, there’s an increasing number of new businesses sprung-up to repair, service and sell parts for them. Trying to buy motorcycle spares in the UK is a real pain as there’s so few dealers, and the prices are nothing short of extortionate for even routine items like brake pads. In Paraguay, there’s a ‘repuestos de moto’ (motorcycle parts) shop every few hundred yards on many main streets, and throughout the country, ‘Taller de Motos’ (motorcycle workshops) are ready to fix your knackered Kenton, Leopard or Taiga until it moves again! As a qualified motorcycle MOT tester, I’m naturally horrified about the state of many of the bikes I see here. Unlike the UK, where many bikes are bought as fairweather ‘toys’, they’re hardly used and maintained regularly, ensuring that the majority are in tip-top condition. When a bike is your only means of transport for the whole family, and particularly if money is very tight, you’re far more likely to keep riding until it breaks. I’ve seen many bikes at the roadside with chains that’ve jumped-off the sprockets as they’re so loose and worn!

Anyway, the availability of cheap motorcycles and parts, coupled with the lack of licence or raining required to ride one means that many more people can now enjoy the benefits of mobility. Even without training, confidence soon comes to many riders who regularly perform daredevil manoeuvring acts of bravery (or stupidity) that’d put a London courier to shame. Driving in car now, you’re constantly looking around for where the next bike’s going to come from. They can fit through gaps just 1cm wider than the width of the handlebars, and think nothing of dislodging one of your wing mirrors in their quest for survival.

Of course, there are a few ‘real’ motorcycles around (by which I mean BIG ones), but just like the UK, these are used for a sunday blast and remain at home the rest of the week. I wouldn’t fancy my chances of cheating death for long if I was riding anything like a Honda Fireblade of a Yamaha ZYF R1, but I reckon a Harley Davidson or similar is better suited to the roads here.

Time to go now as today’s my 40th birthday, and I fancy a little snooze before the ‘celebrations’ commence. More adventures from the frontline shortly, and thanks for reading!

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